Mary oliver gay

As a teenager, Oliver had corresponded with Norma Millay, the sister of poet Edna St. Vincent Millay, who maintained Steeplechase, Edna’s estate in Austerlitz, Unused York. The morning after high educational facility graduation, Oliver left home for Steeplechase, where she helped organize Edna’s papers and where she would live on and off for the next half-dozen years. She attended Ohio State University and Vassar College but did not graduate, eventually moving to Greenwich Village. However, she remained a frequent visitor at Steeplechase.

On one of those visits in the delayed 1950s, Oliver met Village Voice photographer Mary Malone Boil, who was at Steeplechase to seize pictures. It was love at first sight. Oliver moved to Provincetown in 1964 to exist with Cook, who operated the first photography gallery on the East Coast, and their affair lasted for over forty years, until Cook’s death in 2005. In an appreciation written about her and the bookstore that she ran, movie director and Provincetown denizen John Waters described Cook as “beautiful and grumpy and smart” in his book Shock Value: A Tasteful Guide about Bad Taste (1981). Cook’s presence informed some of Oliver’s poems, but it was n

Published in:September-October 2023 issue.

MARY OLIVER (1935–2019) was famously private and accustomed to her ways of functional as a poet, writing often about how she walked with pad and pen at dawn every day through the woods and along the shoreline of Provincetown, and later in Hobe Sound, Florida. Years ago, when I was an editor at Country Living magazine, a glossy Hearst title, I wanted to acquire her contribute a personal essay. Operational through her publisher, I was told that Oliver was wary of a magazine so commercial and that she didn’t use the fax (yes, I’m dating myself) and wouldn’t respond to email. Eventually, I was told that she would compose a piece, but insisted on hand-delivering the finished essay to me at New York’s 92nd Street Y, where she was scheduled to make an appearance.

Prior to the reading, amid a crowd of Birkenstock-clad, gray-haired fans with PBS tote bags, young lesbians sporting multi-colored hair, and other fans of all ages and persuasions, she graciously handed me a sealed envelope. She shook my hand and said with genuine modesty: “I hope that what I wrote is good enough.”

As a longtime reader of hers, I felt as if Sappho herself had waded from


Much has been written about poet Mary Oliverin the week since her death last Thursday.

Describedas "far and away, [America's] best-selling poet," Mary Oliver has been compared to Emily Dickinson, with whom she shared an affinity for solitude and inner monologues. Also, like Dickinson's poetry, Oliver's  combines dark introspection with joyous release.

The poetry of Mary Oliver is also known and celebrated for its clear and poignant observances of the natural world. Indeed, according to the 1983 Chronology of American Literature, one of Oliver's collection of poems, American Primitive, "presents a new thoughtful of Romanticismthat refuses to recognize boundaries between nature and the observing self."

Oliver's creativity was stirred by nature, and, as an avid walker, she often pursued inspiration on foot. Her poems are filled with imagery from her daily walks nearby her home in New England: shore birds, water snakes, the phases of the moon, and humpback whales. In Long Life, a collection of essays, she says, "[I] go off to my woods, my ponds, my sun-filled harbor, no more than a blue comma on the map of the world but, to me, the emblem of everything."


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By Sam Wan. Sam is a ministry worker in the space of sexuality and gender and a board member for several disability ministries. He loves researching in practical theology, reading poetry, looking at art, and podcasting at Conversations with Earl Grey and Espresso and Earl Grey.

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
- Mary Oliver, “Wild Geese”

This Mary Oliver poem, described as “a poem that has saved lives,”[1] has struck me ever since I came across it many years ago. Every period I read it, the darkness seems lighter and the blows that I feel softer. As a Christian, though I might not agree with every aspect, there are ideas in it that parallel conversations I’ve had as a pastor. 

Christians who life attraction to the alike sex or gender incongruence often have difficulty believing that they do not possess to be good. They sometimes feel that they must scrape by on their knees in endless shame, or that they cannot be beloved because of their experience.


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